Navigating the world of parenting is a challenging and often personal experience. But when it comes to families with only children, there are certain phrases that can unwittingly hurt, offend, or simply miss the mark.

Here are five things you should never say to parents of only children:

1. “They’ll be so spoiled!” This comment, while seemingly harmless, implies that only children are inherently entitled and lack social skills. In reality, children are shaped by their upbringing, not the number of siblings they have. Many only children are highly empathetic, independent, and well-adjusted individuals.
2. “They’ll be lonely when you’re gone.” This statement not only ignores the rich and fulfilling relationships only children often build with their parents, but also projects a negative and morbid outlook. It’s insensitive to focus on the potential for future loneliness rather than celebrating the unique bond they share.
3. “Wait till they have kids of their own, then they’ll understand!” This condescending remark diminishes the experiences of parents of only children. Parenting is challenging regardless of family size, and implying that only children will only truly understand once they have their own implies that their current experience is somehow less valid.
4. “Don’t they wish they had a sibling?” This statement makes assumptions about the child’s desires and ignores the possibility that they are perfectly content as an only child. It can also leave parents feeling like they failed to provide their child with a traditional family structure.
5. “At least you don’t have to deal with sibling rivalry!” While sibling rivalry can be challenging, it’s not the only dynamic in a family with multiple children. This comment minimizes the unique set of challenges parents of only children face, such as intense pressure to live up to expectations and potential difficulty navigating peer dynamics.

Instead of making these assumptions, focus on showing genuine interest and empathy. Ask questions about their child’s personality and interests, acknowledge the challenges and joys of parenting an only child, and treat them with the same respect you would any other parent. Remember, families come in all shapes and sizes, and each deserves to be celebrated for their unique dynamic.