Potty training post-mortem: What went wrong, how we recovered and what we learned
Potty training. The dreaded, inevitable, and often messy milestone of parenthood. For some, it’s a breeze. For others, it’s a battleground. We were firmly in the latter camp. Our little adventurer, a spirited two-year-old, seemed completely uninterested in ditching his diapers.
We started with high hopes, armed with charts, rewards, and endless patience. We read all the books, consulted with experts, and even joined a local potty training group. But our best efforts were met with stubborn refusals, accidents galore, and a growing sense of frustration.
What Went Wrong?
Looking back, we realized a few key mistakes:
We started too early. Our son wasn’t ready, both physically and emotionally. He couldn’t grasp the concept of holding it, and the constant pressure to “go” only fueled his resistance.
We focused too much on rewards. While positive reinforcement is important, excessive reliance on rewards can create an unhealthy association between going potty and earning treats.
We didn’t listen to our son’s cues. We were so focused on the “schedule” that we missed subtle signals of readiness, like him hiding to go or holding his diaper.
The Recovery:
We took a step back, relaxed our expectations, and re-evaluated our approach.
We waited. We waited until our son showed more signs of readiness – a consistent interest in the potty, asking to use it, and staying dry for longer stretches.
We focused on positive reinforcement. We celebrated every success, big or small, with enthusiastic praise and hugs.
We listened and responded to his cues. We encouraged him to tell us when he needed to go and respected his preferences, whether it was using the potty or the toilet.
Lessons Learned:
Potty training isn’t a race; it’s a journey. Here are the biggest takeaways from our experience:
Patience is key. Be patient with yourself and your child. It will happen eventually!
Trust your instincts. Listen to your child’s cues and adjust your approach accordingly.
Don’t be afraid to seek help. Potty training can be challenging, and there’s no shame in seeking guidance from experts or support groups.
The End (For Now):
Our son is now fully potty trained, and we couldn’t be happier. It wasn’t always smooth sailing, but we learned a lot about patience, communication, and the importance of letting our child lead the way.
For anyone embarking on the potty training journey, remember that every child is different. Embrace the process, celebrate the victories, and stay positive – you’ve got this!